Weekly One-Shot #98: "Cult of Gloom Recruitment Party

Absolute Zero, Freedom Six Unity, Dark Watch Mr. Fixer, and Santa Guise vs. Gloomweaver (on Ultimate) in the Realm of Discord. Randomized start. 

I had a relatively easy time with this one, final HP 10/19/23/20, and that's mostly because AZ did one of his patented 15-self-damage Thermal Shockwaves.

Gloomy opened with the Grimoire and got the Pouch of Bones out in round 3, but otherwise, he whiffed on a couple of Vast Followings and played out a couple pins and Profane Zealots before he went down.

AZ was fully set up with Apertures, both modules, Thermal Shockwave, and both Impales in short order thanks to presents from Guise and an early Time Flies. He did the lion's share of the damage.

Unity had very poor draws and was paralyzed by the Grimoire, though an early Stealth Bot did serve us well and saved us from 1 discard per round. By the time Fixer pulled out Salvage Yard to help Unity get her hand together, Gloomy was already mostly dead.

Fixer opened Jack Handle / Grease Monkey Fist and ended up with three Bloody Knuckles by the end of round 3, so he played crowd control while AZ focused on Gloomy.

Guise passed out presents quickly in the first two rounds thanks to Hasty Augmentation and I Can Do That Too! AZ's presents were the only really useful stuff, though. He got to copy Glacial Structure and draw a bunch of extra cards, but it didn't amount to much.

Poor Gloomy, even on Ultimate he just can't seem to get it together to pose an actual threat. Mint with Unity on 17 as the lowest here. I'll admit, I was a little disheartened when Gloomweaver opened with the Pouch of Bones, but he then proceeded to waste all of his Vast Followings, and Guise gimmicked the drum into his trash after they were all gone.

Unity rapidly built up a vast bot army and chewed Gloomy down to size with platform bots and shockwaves, and Absolute Zero did the rest. Special mention should go to Mr. Fixer though, for shutting down Gloomweaver (well, his pins, really) for two rounds by deflecting damage from Ethereal Bonds back to him, fun stuff!

Mint but tougher than is usual for Gloomweaver. First turn Pouch of Bones, but got lucky and discarded Drum of Dispair with Gimmicky Character.

Once Unity and AZ had their presents opened it was an easy win though.

Mint here too, basically a steamroller. Gloomy had such a slow start (didn’t see a relic until the midgame) that I got everybody fully set up. AZ had all of his equipment and Cold Snap; Unity had several Platform Bots, Champion Bot, Stealth Bot (definitely the MVB), and Swift Bot; Fixer had Dual Crowbars, Harmony, and Grease Monkey Fist (letting him land 9-point hits on Gloomy even though Advanced mode); and Guise…used I Can Do That, Too! on himself at least twice to spread the gifting around.

That was fun. :D

The secret to Ultimate GW is ignore the relics. You can't kill them, so don't bother! Focus (non-melee and projectile) damage on Gloomweaver and you'll take him down in no time.

Also, it turns out having indestructible targets on the field means Mr. Fixer never runs out of things to bounce Dual Crowbars off of. :3 Just get that Grease Monkey Fist first!

Failed on my first attempt, laustrophobic Delusion came out, and lasted three turns before it got repalced or I got a environemnt destruction

I did not turn my frown into eldritch power to spite a world that has wronged me - I turned it upsidedown instead!

Mint.  The book came out almost immediately, but AZ started out with Sub-Zero Atmosphere, Mr. Fixer started with Jack Handle and quickly drew Dual Crowbars and Meditation, and Unity started with Swift Bot and Stealth Bot.  After that it was easy - all three Vast Followings got dumped early, and I never saw the other two relics.  Subzero Atmosphere made the cultists easy to deal with, and Stealth Bot turned the Negative Energy Field into a positive effect.  Never lost a bot, and the heroes probably did more damage to themselves then the Cult did to them.

Failed on my first attempted because I forgot he was on Ultimate and I spent too long trying to destroy relics. Wah wah.

Mint. I got the Drum on turn 1.  That was fun, being low on cards.  Sacced some presents to the drum, but it didn't slow me down.

That said, PoB and SotG didn't come out until after there were no Zombies, and he mostly played pins (OtD hit like a train, but only got a couple of hits in in the first place)

AZ never saw his Apetures,but he had every copy of both modules in hand and most Modular Realignments by turn 3.  Add an early Impale, a present of Cold Snap and Thermal Shockwave (Never actually used.  Imbued Fraility was out, and there was no way I was intentionally doing 25 damage to myself at 15 hp)

Took Gloomy down after relic 3 came out, before he flipped.

Long and sloggy, due to a long staying Time Crawls, but that also helped keep Stealth Bot.

Drums of Despair came out early and Guise’s gift allowed me to ignore taking any damage since I could destroy the presents.  AZ ended up being the main one to dispatch Gloomweaver and Raptor bots took out various minions.  Fixer got Dual Crowbars and Grease Monkey out which works well with indestructible targets.  

I got an early Driving Mantis on Fixer, which made me completely ignore the Crimson Pin that got put on him early.  Fixer distinguished himself by dealing with all the non-gloomy stuff.

It's funny, I was digging and digging through AZ's deck to find Focused Apertures. It wasn't until he got gifted a Realignment that I found out Guise had thrown one in the trash.

Oh, Guise, you rascal. :V

Guise just tossed the Cryo Chamber in the trash for me. 

I brought it back just to have Fixer break it.

Easy Mint.  Guise was unhappy about being unable to punch Gloomy, and there was nothing else to punch because of Jack Handle and Raptor-Bots.  Very irritating that Fixer went right before Guise, so Guise wasn't able to copy Grease Monkey Fist.  But Guise did get to hand out very generous present packages to Unity (two Supply Crates, Cryo-Bot, and a Raptor Bot) and Absolute Zero (Cryo Chamber, Thermal Shockwave, an Onboard Module Installation which let him draw and play Cold Snap, and finally a Hoarfire).  Combined with multiple Platform Bots, Champion Bot, and a well-timed Imbued Frailty, Gloomy went down in pretty short order.

Guise can't copy GMF anyway, he blows it up. :B

He can copy it if I'm That Guy comes out first, and then Monkey Fist.  But that wasn't useful given this turn order.

Gasp Gloomweaver forcing you to destroy your Christmas presents? He truly IS a black-hearted Demon-God!

Mint. Not too awful, all heroes made it out. Had a second round drum appearance but that was the worst it got.

Did not draw Grease Monkey Fist, Driving Mantis or the means to bring either out onto the field so Fixer largely sat around doing nothing while AZ and Unity obliterated the field after being set up quickly with the help of copious presents. This makes me want to try an AZ/Unity/Santa Guise game for kicks and grins.  

Mint. Things looked bad at first at Gloomy pulled a Cursed Acolyte on turn one and I drew very little damage output.  He walloped on me for a few turns, bringing the heroes HP down to the low teens. 

However, once Fixer drew crowbars and monkey fist and the team started opening Santa Guise's presents things turned around quickly.  AZ got set up as a healing machine to tank, Unity got some bots out to eliminate the smaller targets, and Fixer wailed away on Gloomy with occassional boosts from bloody knuckles or inspired repair.  After that, the game was never in doubt.

The most important thing I remembered was to not let Fixer open any presents as the odds were high that it would force him to lose his crowbar/monkeyfist set up.

I do have to say, Dark Watch Fixer being able to blow up Guise's oneshots RIGHT before Guise's turns was pretty nice.

Easy mint. It might have been Hallowe'en, but Christmas came early. The drums came out very soon, but Santa Guise proved the solution for that, feeding Gloomweaver presents every turn and stuffing his stocking with everyone else's presents. Then the Grimoire came out, but by that time Stealth Bot was around to mostly distract Gloomweaver while Fixer, Santa Guise and Absolute Zero sat around discarding cards and rewriting the book to tell the tale of the Night Before Christmas. Abosolute Zero brought some festive weather with Sub-Zero atmosphere so that whenever the cultists showed up, Unity broke out her not-so-small collection of toys and played with them all in the snow until they decided to go home and sing carols with their families.

Absolute Zero started a huge bonfire to finish off the night. Last anyone saw of Gloomweaver, him and Guise were leaning against one another with a trail of vodka bottles scattered behind them and looking to find some reindeer to ride.

Mint.  I got lucky and never saw any relics, but Mister Fixer never did get those crowbars he wanted.  Guess he'll have to wait for next Christmas.

Mint.

Pretty much same as others.  Fixer’s Knuckles were so very, very Bloody.  And radiant.

This may have been one of my dumbest Mints ever.

Right on Turn 1, Mr. Fixer played Driving Mantis. Then the Ethereal Bonds came out, and Mr. Fixer had the most health, so every Environment Turn they redirected damage to Gloomweaver, who was promptly locked down. Mr. Fixer and Guise blew up every cultist and zombie that came out while Unity's rapidly expanding robot swarms energy bolted Gloom and Absolute Zero just set everyone on frost. 

Gloomweaver never got to do damage again. He had his Drum and Grimoire out by the end, but since they both caused him to do damage, I ignored them completely. 

Mint. Unity and Zero did the hard work. I eventually had apertures, 2 impales and a Cold Snap out for Zero, allowing 8 damage each turn before he even played a card.
Unity got out several bots, with a pair of zaps from platform bots adding another 6 to gloomy each round.
Guide gave out presents. Also now realize I’m that Guy doesn’t copy Impale.
Fixer mostly beat up pins and cultists, since I couldn’t find Grease Monkey Fist until the last round. of course, finding it made it the last round because I smacked Zero with a crowbar and made him Blast Gloomy with 9 cold damage for the kill.

I'm That Guy does copy Impale, but it doesn't give it a target, so it's a targetless Impale.  :D

I found that out the hard way.

it shouldn't copy impale, because the impale card is not in Zero's play area.

Well.  There you go.